My Own Series of Unfortunate Events

On average I do not consider myself a complete ditz, klutz, airhead, unlucky, or as if the universe was out to get me.
However, I am beginning to wonder. This turn of events began about week and a half ago when I headed out to my car in full joy of a nice sunny day, singing "Oh what a beautiful morning". I got in my car, key in ignition....aaaand nothing. My car didn't even feign an attempt at starting. Thank God I had just joined AAA. I had to call my boss to tell her I was going to be late and I waited for my rescue. The AAA guy came, looked at my battery, and suggested I just buy a new one- this sucker was dead. So, bought a new battery (not so cheap it turns out), and headed off to work. Later that weekend as I drove up to Camarillo to visit some friends my car overheated and I was nearly stranded out in the middle of nowhere. Thankfully the "nowhere" was close enough for my friend's mom and brother to come rescue me and my car. I don't think I will ever fully escape the feeling of being a kid. A few days later I decided to take a step outside of my apartment for some fresh air. As I closed the screen door my hand (by pure habit) decides to lock the door. There was a moment of looking at the door and feeling the urge to panic. But logic came into play and I realize panicking is not going to aid this situation at all. With only shorts, tank top, and n shoes, I'm thankful it's a warm night. I sit on my little cement porch and start praying that this will be the night my roommate comes home early. I even think "I could sleep out here, it's not cold. I'm sure she'll be home at some point." Cue cockroach scurrying across the step. "Nope, I think it's time to finally meet my neighbors." So after finally mustering up the courage knock on my neighbor's door I ask for some advice on how to get myself back into my apartment. We go through a few options like calling my landlord (I say "no" since it's 11pm at this point), just trying to break in ourselves (I say "no" since I have to no money to pay for buying a new door), and looking up my roommates number by looking up my cell phone bill online ( I say "yes" to this one). Unfortunately AT&T's site is down. Thanks to Facebook, I find a friend's number that would have my roommate's number (did I mention I am sans phone?). I finally get ahold of my roommate at 11pm, she is at a restaurant and says she'll be home soon. 12:30 am rolls around, no roommate. I'm getting antsy while I'm watching Jackass on my neighbor's couch feeling like a jackass myself. Due to her own fiasco, my roommate does not show up until 2am. Finally I get back in, 4 hours later and my neighbor asked if he could have a cup of sugar, I gladly offered it up.
So, finally, we're at last Saturday. I've relayed these fun fiasco adventures to a friend and he says "well, there's that rule of 3s. You should be good for now". Little did I know how wrong he was. I headed up to Camarillo once again for a bit of the Labor Day weekend and on my way I stop at a gas station (the same one I had to stop at with my over heated car) to get something to drink. Come to find out, my card doesn't want to work. My card is declined for a slushy. After calling customer service I get no answer since they are closed and I find myself facing the 3 day weekend with $1 in my wallet and half a tank of gas to get me back home and wherever else I need to get before Tuesday. Awesome.
The topper. #5 to my broken rule of 3. I get to my friends house, hang out, have a good time, get back to my car....aaaaand my keys are locked in my car. I have NEVER done this. NEVER. Thank you AAA for being awesome and coming to my rescue once again.
I would like to mention the fact that my "adopted" California parents of my friend totally surprised me by sneaking a little bit of emergency cash in my wallet that weekend. Yay for yet again feeling like a helpless kid.
I'm hoping this concludes my run of fiasco for quite awhile.
Here's to a quiet week.

Now What?

It's official, I'm an iO West (formally improv Olympic) alum. It took me roughly a year filled with 4 address changes, 3 jobs, one class session hiatus, and a ridiculous amount of fighting off my own expectation to be perfect right off the bat. Amazing how we can not accept the fact that there is nothing wrong being a beginner. I've been reading Rilke's Letters to a Young Poet and find it just the thing I need to hear. I highly recommend this quaint little book. An easy read and just nice dose of "hey dude, chill out and enjoy the process of growing. Quit beating yourself up and asking other people for answers. You got it in you kid." Ya, a dose of that.
So now what? This huge looming cloud (not a bad one or like the stormy rain clouds that I miss so much from the Pacific Northwest), has lifted and moved on. No longer am I spending 6 nights a week at the theatre, rushing from work to theatre to bed to work to theatre to bed...
Two weeks I've had this freedom and have enjoyed evenings in, hanging out with friends outside of the bar/theatre, and just spending time letting the dust settle. Give me another week and I'll be aching to start up projects again. Already in the works is the third episode of Dear Hollywood, my silent movie improv group, and a two person show with my good friend Katie Conway. Oh, did I mention I start up Kickball again next Monday. I consider this taking it easy.
Meanwhile...I'm actually enjoying my days working at the credit union.
Sorry, no crazy stories yet. Trust me, they are on there way. Once again I have a stack of notes for future entries (I just wanted to get you caught up). Crazies still come in, that's why I keep coming back. Right? ya....right.

Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen

When you feel at a loss for direction usually you ask someone for a little help. But the more people you ask the the more you find yourself going in circles.
And when it comes to asking advice about guys...forget it. I'm done with that. I wish I could show you a montage of what I've been hearing. It's just too comical to take too seriously my confusion. "Play hard to get", "Tease him", "Be aggressive", "Wait for him to come to you", "I can tell he likes you", "I don't think he's that in to you", it's ridiculous and it only proves that we don't really know anything about the opposite sex. I think if you just stay true to yourself you'll come across someone else just being themselves....and maybe something will happen.
I'm at the point of saying just "Forget it". I wish I no one would have gotten involved. It's truly embarrassing. I feel like a middle schooler. Do we ever grow out of this social awkwardness?
I know there's no point in trying to fight against the natural pull to find someone to share my life with...but there is line where you're just trying to hard. Then things get weird.
I'm tired of weird. I'm tired of awkward. And I'm tired of caring too much.
Done.

To My L.A Friends:

Have you ever been so happy that you find yourself embarrassed by it?
That's where I've found myself these days. But I have a good excuse.
Less than 2 months ago I was packing my bags to move back home to Washington. Leaving all I had worked for behind so I could move back into my parents house. Not even in my old room- my sister had taken that over. I would have got the basement.
I'm not usually a dark and depressed person. Even when I'm depressed only my close friends can tell. So to go from the "depths of despair" to discovering I have a second chance at living in L.A and pursuing improv at the iO (the very reason I moved down here) my heart filled with joy.
Coming so close to loosing all the friends I had made since being out here has made me appreciate L.A so much more.
Never in my life did I think I would live in L.A, but here I am. And I love it.
I'm realizing it's not the backdrop to our lives that gives it meaning, but who we are living our lives with.
Now when I see my friends I want to give them the biggest hug and a kiss on the cheek. "I almost lost you!" And with each evening spent hanging out I think "I would have missed getting to know you more and enjoying this moment." And with each new friend I make I feel like for once in my life I might be settling down (I haven't stayed in one place longer than a year since graduating high school).
How funny to call the last place on earth you thought you would like home.
My dear friends, I'm so happy my time has not been cut short with you. That we have so many adventures ahead of us. More little jokes to share, more heart to share, and so many things that I can't even guess at. It may seem silly, but I'm so happy I want to somehow share it with you. I wish I could literally give this joy to you.
I'm happy because you make this a home for me.

Dear Hollywood: Episode 2

Here's is the second installment of my Dear Hollywood series.



Through a strange turn of events, I may not have to move home as soon as I thought. I had an interview with bank today. This time a credit union. I really hope it all works out. Life...so funny.

Just Wondering...

I've begun a new project. A sort of web series discovering Hollywood from a hopeful innocent point of view.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OHQOvZOKBs

I was on set last night for a movie. My first time on the Warner Bros. lot, and it finally felt like the old school movie making experience I was hoping for. We were using the "New York" set, but instead of it making me ache for my own staring role in a big time movie, I suddenly found myself aching to see New York.
I knew moving down to L.A that it wasn't going to be a place I wanted to settle down forever. Although, as the months passed I grew to like southern California much more than I ever thought. Still, in my heart, I knew I would never be an L.A girl, or even a Cali girl.
It could be due to work being so slow, to exhaustion from trying desperately to find ways to pay my rent and other bills, to feeling so vulnerable and burnt out, that I find myself looking for the next step.
I've been considering moving back home to regroup my thoughts and pay back my parents for their ever-so-loving financial support.
I feel I have lost sight of what I want to do with my life (granted I kow there are new chapters and directions and things continue to change), but do I really want to be in movies? What about my desire to use comedy as therapy and counseling? What about more stage acting? What about going back to school? What about...? What about?...so much.
I will always be "studying" comedy and acting. But maybe it's time for a scene change. I miss clusters of tall buildings and brooding grey skies.
It's wierd, but I feel like something is pushing me to move out. At least for awhile. Maybe it's my history of not staying anywhere longer than 2 years (and feeling antsy after 1) since I graduated.
I don't know quite how to decipher through these feelings and thoughts.
We shall see.

Boldly Going Back To My Childhood

So I watched the new Star Trek movie last night and it was so weird how certain sound effects and lines totally took me back to watching Star Trek with my parents and sis when I was younger. The rest of my family was totally into it but I just camped on the outskirts of interest most of the time. Still, I'm sure I watched almost every episode of TNG because thats what we'd watch after dinner as a family.
It's very rare that I get into "action" type movies or those "saga" films with sequels, prequels, and so ons. Star Wars does absolutely nothing for me, Lord of the Rings was fun to watch once while at the movie theatre, Harry Potter was good for the movie theatre as well. And Star Trek I can't say I know too many details about the movies - although I vividly remember the one with the whales (but that's because I was totally in my marine mammal biology phase - before I got grossed out by fish). I started liking the t.v series a little more when the character "Wesley" arrived...'cause he was cute and I was just learning about crushes.
I know the difference between Star Trek, The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, and Voyager. All seemed to be in the back ground at home. I remember my favorite character in TNG was "Q". Oh that Q, always throwing monkey wrenches in and then being witty! The show had humor and some pretty good acting and fun story lines. All this seemed to be deeply burried until last night. I didn't realize how the show was really just having fun.
So, to go along with true form and showing how history repeats itself: I'm again intrigued by Star Trek.
Oh... did I mention I have a crush on Zachary Quinto? Move over Wesley, helloooo Spock.